The nature of friendship

I went to see a mate after work today that I haven't seen in ages and that I've been friends with since I was 12 years old. We did the usual, drank tea, talked about shite while her 3 lovely boys ran around like lunatics and I bid my farewells after about an hour.

But for the rest of this evening I've been filled with this enormous warmth and sense of well being. It's got me thinking on the nature of friendship.

I'm not really close to any of my family other than the next sister down from me and even at that it's been a pretty fraught relationship over the years, but I'm really blessed by the friends that I've managed to gather into my life. And these people are my real family. I love them very deeply and do genuinely believe that I have managed to carry some of them from one lifetime into this one.

So, are the people that we are brought up with, brought into this world by our real family or is it the one we create for ourselves? For the vast majority of the people I know they are really just survivors of their childhoo ds and family's more than anything else. I am more and more convinced that my family are actually my friends.

The ones that really know me - you know the real me the one that deep down in those dark places that we don't like to talk about at parties, just wants to sit in the corner and observe everything - know that I'm really quite a solitary soul. I love my own company and tend to talk a lot while saying very little, well one of my very closest friends is the exact same - she is the life and soul, little miss entertainer, sun is always shining and together we're just a laugh a minute, sit back and enjoy the show - and yet alone it's very different. We crossed paths years ago and have been friends ever since. So was it chance that brought that about or was it something else?

Why is it that when one of my other friends is upset I get her smell in my nose even when she was the other side of the globe in Brazil?

What is it about friendship that makes it so very intergal to my life? Why is it that I can walk away from bonds with family or lovers and not even give it a second thought and yet a falling out with a friend will leave me devastated? Is that normal?

I'm not sure that it is from what other people tell me. Wonder if I'll ever figure out if I'm wired normally?